Forgiveness.

 In class we had a brief discussion on forgiveness with Alex. It is a well known belief that forgiveness is divine, and Jesus forgave people so you should follow his example and forgive everyone too.

But is there limits to forgiveness? Awhile ago Professor Silliman told a story about a woman who falsely accused a man of raping her, and now they are friends many years later. Now that is forgiveness.

I think forgiveness is an individuals choice and telling someone that they have to forgive their friend is condescending. Even if you are told to forgive someone you might still hold a grudge if you aren't ready to "forgive and forget". Another topic we discussed was holding a grudge once you have "forgiven" the individual. The class was torn on if you are holding a grudge than you haven't forgiven them, and others considered a grudge and forgiveness as two separate ideas.

Forgiveness and holding a grudge go together like peanut butter and jelly. If you are forced to forgive someone than you will most likely still be holding a grudge.

I am not talking about forgiveness when it comes to borrowing your sisters shirt without asking. I'm referring to life changing altercations.

I have some experience with holding a grudge. My mother is a big believer in forgive and forget because that's what Jesus would do (nothing drives me more nuts than when she whips out this statement). Just because Jesus could forgive and forget doesn't mean you can pull his philosophy on forgiveness as a back up plan.